Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Big Cartel Store

Etsy changed how their store system worked, so we don't have a store there anymore. However, we now have a store on Big Cartel! We've simplified the products available and hopefully it makes sense. If you have any questions please email twofistedstories@gmail.com.

Saturday, July 1, 2017

Foolish Earthlings! You will SUBMIT to Weird Library Science!

Foolish Earthlings! You will SUBMIT!

The fate of your very planet relies on you creating enough GLOW (Galactic Library Oriented Wisdom) Power to defeat the evil BEIGE (Book-Eating, Information-Grinding Entities).

How do you create GLOW Power? Using your TOWERING imagination you must create the most ACTION-PACKED stories, comics, drawings, photographs, recipes, knitting patterns, phony letters, fake news items, bogus advertisements, made-up issue blurbs, and whatever else you can think of as long as it is filled with THRILLS, EXCITEMENT, and LIBRARIES. Mad science, weird fantasy, occult horror, spicy mysteries, noirish romances, intense adventures, and whatever else.

Stories can be about librarians, library technicians, library cats, sentient libraries, etc. Write about a library that uses ALIEN TECHNOLOGY, a cataloguing system so obtuse that it drives those that try to use it INSANE, or a library worker who has to track down a Nazi zeppelin in order to get an OVERDUE BOOK. As long as your contribution is somewhat library focused and filled with the requisite GLOW Power it's fine!

So get out your typewriters, crayons, and drawing sticks (or whatever it is you Earthlings create with) and create something or the Earth you call home is DOOMED!

Weird Library Science is the 9th (!) issue of Two-Fisted Library Stories, an anthology zine featuring pulp-inspired fiction, comics, and art created by you (hopefully!) concerning libraries and library workers.

Submission Deadline: December 31st, 2017

Publication: Spring, 2018

Send submissions to twofistedstories@gmail.com.

Call for Contributions: The Journal of Two-Fisted Library Studies Vol. 8, No. 1

Call for Contributions

The Journal of Two-Fisted Library Studies Vol. 8, No. 1:

A Special Issue on

“Visualizing the Information Professional Fight”

The Journal of Two-Fisted Library Studies is a formidable and indomitable journal that publishes the most POTENT articles, reviews, and research findings of interest to those working in the ROUGHEST and TOUGHEST libraries and archives in the world. Our intense editorial process ensures that only the most UNYIELDING and TENACIOUS authors will have their content reach the publication stage and become CONQUERORS OF SCHOLARLY COMMUNICATION.

Journal Sections
  • Spurious Correlations and Other Graphs
  • Really Useless Research
  • Model Library Policies (fanciful to aggressive)
  • Opinions (incorrect)
  • Fight Reports
  • Peer Reviews (reviews of awful people you work with)
  • Pier Reviews (reviews of docks, jetties, and similar things that are somehow library related)
  • Reviews of Other Stuff

Submission Deadline: September 1st, 2017
Publication: October 31st, 2017

Send submissions to twofistedstories@gmail.com.
  • Bibliographies and citations are not necessary and will probably be cut for space
  • Copyright will be decided through trial by combat
  • Article Processing Charges are expected and encouraged
  • Contributors receive up to one free copy of the issue in which their work appeared

Position on Predatory Publishers
We believe that only the strongest publishers can survive and that it is only natural that some publishers will prey upon others. We do not intend to be prey.

Position on Open Access Publishing
We fully support scholarly Openness, for which reason we allow anyone to purchase our publications. Our commitment to Openness extends to describing our editorial process, in excruciating detail and in print, including exactly what we think of our submitters, their writing style, ideas, and personal grooming. For a nominal fee, we will omit this information from the publication.

Editors: Dr. Dragomir Arson and Dr. Nzinga Ransom

The editors have, at one time or another, won the World Heavyweight Library Championship, the Mixed Tag Team Library Championship, the Atomic Library Association Championship, and the Theresa Elmendorf Memorial Library Battle Royale. They are willing to take on any Library Adversaries anytime and anywhere.

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Read Two-Fisted Library Stories #6 Online

I've uploaded Two-Fisted Library Stories #6 to Issuu and you can read it there. It even (sorta) includes the trading card! Check it out!

In other news, due to new Etsy policies the store is closed. I'm looking into alternatives but it might take a while.

Monday, October 31, 2016

Two-Fisted Library Stories #6 now available!

Two-Fisted Library Stories #6 is now available! It features:

  • Automagic Notice by Devin Lagasse
  • How to Steal a Book in 1930s Chicago Part 3 by Matthew Murray
  • Better Read Than Dead by Colleen Frakes
  • The Libearian by Taylor Kenkel
  • A back cover by Dana Putnam

Plus! Six-Gun Librarian comic strips, letters pages, an interview with the creators of The NEW Library Legion, and more! Plus every copy comes with a trading card!

You an buy it (and the other issues) on our Etsy store.

Thanks to everyone that came to the launch party, and especially those who won prizes in the costume contest!

The winners!


(Costume contest judges)

Sunday, September 4, 2016

Spicy Library Stories Call for Submissions

Love! Romance! Adventure!

As mentioned in the newest episode of the Book Club for Masochists podcast our next publication (after Two-Fisted Library Stories #6) will be Spicy Library Stories!

The deadline is December 31st. Send submissions to twofistedstories@gmail.com.

What do we mean by "spicy"?

Well in the tradition of Spicy Zeppelin Stories and other titles we're looking for the best in library focused fiction that features not just the daring adventure tales we're so well known for, but is also a little bit risqué or saucy. This doesn't mean that you need to create full blown erotic tales (though we'll accept those too), but place just a little bit more emphasis on the...attractiveness of the featured characters. That means love, romance, and scantily dressed men, women, and people of other genders having their clothes ripped off.

We want tales full of forbidden love, seduction, star-crossed lovers, romantic tension, mysterious pasts, makeovers, love triangles, and purple prose.

We want bodice-ripping, paranormal events, time travel, historical settings, suspense, fantasy, BDSM, and everything else (maybe in one story!).

We want stories that involve lesbian, gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, queer, and polyamorous characters. (And anything else we forgot.)

We want lascivious stories about tempters and temptresses, femmes and hommes fatales, dudes and dames in distress, bombshells, rakes, vamps, cads, seducers, vixens,  and everyone else.

Just remember that it has to feature library workers prominently in some way.

It can be as chaste or raunchy as you want, and if you'd really just rather not, you can still submit and we'll publish it in the next issue of Two-Fisted Library Stories!

If you're looking to contribute art for the cover or interior think of the classic "good girl" pin-up art, except that we want pin ups of people of all gender identities!

We're also totally happy to let people use pseudonyms, sobriquets, aliases, and noms de plume if you would prefer for your true identity to remain secret. Not even we need to know what your real name is!

Planned release is in time for Valentines day 2017!

Also, check out this article about female creators working in the pulps of the early 20th century.